The Royal Wedding Commentary Part #5

Now, they're taking a vow. *pause* What are they doing? You love my voice? Thank you, but...I was totally kidding! That's not my real singing voice [Uh, actually, it is] by the way! ♫That's my Broadway VOICE! I can be a baritone or I can be *high pitch* ALTO! Or back to *low voice* baritone! Sweet, Lord! JESUS LOVES ME! He really does. My Tila...Army.♫

*methsmack* *Reading screen* Shut the eff up you disgusting...perverts--that's coming in my chatroom...*methsmack* I'm going to delete you and block your ass! *pause* Perverts! Go...whack off something else. *methsmack* Thank you! I, um, thank you, Steven. I'm glad you like my voice. *methsmack* Um, *pause* Germany? Uh, uh, have I ever been to Germany? You know what? That's the only place I've not been too. So...wait! *pause* Well, I was booked to go there but we ended up not able to go there. Yeah, I remember now. So, yeah. I'm hoping able to go this year! *methsmack* I love Germany! Ummm...*pause* I love you, guys, too, and I'm having a lot of fun here. I'm glad you like my voice, even though I was joking. Should I-should I just go and perform and sing like, Broadway style *flips hair back* like that?

♫HELLO! WELCOME! HEY! WELCOME TO MY SHOW! FOR MY BROADWAY!! AND I PRAY EVERY TIME you look at me. I feel a little ecstasy in my heart. I know why. You don't want to...even know what I'm saying. But, I know that you want to be with me forever and ever! I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding! OOooooh! JESUS has come to MY LIFE!♫ *laughs* Okay! Whatever! Just kidding, guys. Oh, he did--he just said JESUS CHRIST! So, they are...Jesus Christ again! I was right! See?! *flips hair back* They're--they're preaching about Jesus Christ so, I was right, and I sang, hopefully the right sermon--is that what you call--a sermon? To Jesus Christ! *pause* *claps*

Amen! Another song! *pause* *playing with hair* Here we go! Everyone, sing! Everybody's singing now. That is, a lot of people there. They have like, eight more hours to go to--of this wedding here. Um...*methsmack* Oh, Elton John! *Caroline accent* Hello! Quite the feisty diva, Mr....Elton John! *plays with hair* He's feisty! He's quite a feisty fellow, there! Don't tell him I said that. He'll rip my ass to shreds. *chuckles* But then again, I've got *inaudible* so, don't bother! *pause* *methsmack* *normal voice* Okay. Everybody, let's sing-a-long, even though we don't know what they're singing right now. But um, I'm gonna try to make my own sermon. Okay. *plays with hair* I'm gonna be very sweet now, like an angel for this wedding. *pause* *sings that resonates more scratching sounds* ♫And when I say that you love me, I love you even more. I hope that you will--you and I will get married one day--♫ WHOOPS! I fell on my bed! *methsmack* ♫I fell on my bed. Don't really know what's going on. I'm just doing the commentary for the more in time. For Kate and...♫ I keep forgetting his name except Henry and Harry. His name is Henry...right?

Bravo! Bravo. *claps* Silence? Again. Everyone, pray. *mocking* *Caroline accent* Oh, Mighty Lord, and everlasting God! *pause* *normal voice* God, come on to me! Jesus! Protect me! Protect, the royal...the royal...the royal...wedding? The royal...husband and wife? What do you call it? The um, the bride's maids and groom? The bride maids and groom. *plays with hair* Lord, protect the...bride and groom. Will and grace. *chuckles* No. Will and Kate! Uh, back to singing! Everyone, sing! I'm an angel. See? I even have wings! *pause* *typing* Hold on. *typing* *plays with hair* Oh, the big orchestra! So ravishing, darling! ♫Here, I come! Here, I come. Miss Tila's coming so they have the drum rolls. And I am on my way! And I am on my way to the wedding. I am the bride's maid not really, but I can be...in my head because I'm crazy, but they love me...*inaudible* Joy to the world, the Lord has come! Let earth--I don't know the words! La la la la la la la...duh duh duh duh duhhh...♫ Oh. My bad.

I have to shut up again cause every time I sing, they get quiet. Like, Tila shut up! I'm sorry! I'm just so excited! Sorry! God! I just wanna be there! I'm sorry! I just wanna sing and like, be part of this wedding! I'll stop singing now. Sorry! You're so mean! *fake cry* I wanna to sing. Okay! They're gonna let me sing again! *flips hair back* Okay! Thank you! Okay. Okay. They're letting me back! So I can sing again! *plays with hair* *pause* *chuckles* Hold on! They're not singing yet! It's just like, uh, intro. So...I have to dance like a ballerina first. *pause* Oh! *Caroline accent* Oh! And it is over! Oh, Christ's sake! It's over! I went from 3 to 4am and it's 4am now in L.A. And now, it's over. So, now my show is officially over for the royal wedding. I'm glad you'd tuned in to join me. Although it's quite an odd time here, so, um, I've recorded this so you can watch it later if you've got time. If you've missed out today. Oh, look! They're back! But, I'm actually getting off in 5 minutes, so...*methsmack*

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